So I'm a tad less nervous about the upcoming research

Well after the meeting with my supervisor, worked out at least the 'Maybe we can do this' research. She's paged the cardiologist at Westmead and gonna get back to me in a few days. Right now, as per usual, have to do a lot more reading and start the intro and background of the thesis.

Basically what I'll most likely be doing, since it hasn't been done before (or it hasn't been published yet), a longitudinal retrospective cohort quantative study on pts with implantable cardioverter defibrillators (ICDs) for greater than 5 years. I'll probably be getting 30 to 60 subjects through postal survey sampling method, and stalk down through telephone survey for the people who don't get back to me. Possibly doing quality of life surveys (SF36) or something by another instrument. My supervisor's gonna contact some American researchers and see if their new collection method is appropriate to use.
Gotta write the ethics application for WSAHS and put it through before attempting to even think about how much this'll all cost.

I think it'll be very interesting to see the results, mortality and morbidity is what I'm most interested in, hehe, and possibly for something much more controversial, the type of ICD, as in Guidant or Medtronic, (Guidant having very recently had recalls in their ICDs...). Eeep, just thinking about that and doing any research into that could cause enemies, meanwhile this one as well, if the pts state the surgeon who implanted the ICD and if there were any further MACE (major adverse cardiac events). Meeep.

Soooo...

Yea, so I had Full House (K drama) the whole time! For fans of ff, here's Full house a Lily/James fic based on the K drama. Unfinished but not bad at all, kinda AU. Gonna watch it tonight after a shower, the leading lady's very pretty, the leading guy... not so much (there's something rather off-putting about men who have a tendency to show off their pecs). Thank God for English subtitles, and no-need-to-use-your-brain light-hearted comedy.

Oh yes, had blood drawn today and my annual flu vaccination (upper (L) arm kinda sore). Will go back next week for the results. My BP's gone down a little but I'm still a tad worried about it, 130/75 (!!!). At age 20, a systolic of 130??? I need to do more exercise.
So let's see, tests for Heps A, B, C, HIV, Varicella, FBC, UEC, TSH, and gaaah, I don't know about my hormones ones. Those need to be taken at Day 21 *nudge* and considering I'm all "wacko" that'll be extraordinarily difficult. And she asked me about rubella again, or what-is-related-to-rubella.
LADIES: if you ever wanna get pregnant or are sexually active, please check your MMR status.

Yea, I had a nice thorough talk with the GP about that. I really enjoyed it, I really do like this new GP, she's actually informing pts about tests and such whereas before, my previous GPs did jackcrap (legally they should). Sooo... this week's personal questions, instead of about UTIs, more so about my sexual inactivity (funnily enough the temptation to smirk wasn't strong, because I have to ask people these questions as well) *shrugs in indifference*

GREETINGS! To the people who read my blog but don't post. Feel free to pinch me on a pain-free arm next time you see me ... so I can threaten GBH.

Londonderry Air

Danny Boy is also known as Londonderry Air. Danny Boy is of course, the more obvious title, I've known it as Danny Boy as a child, and then older when someone pointed out it was called Londonderry Air. *ahhh... nodding*

So Danny Bhoy was on Saturday night. Yays for recordings! You know, I'm not actually that cynical Angi. I may appear to be it with that look on my face but like a Microsoft Word Document, that's my default face, really it is. It's kinda sad that people think I'm more cynical than I really am. Ah well, at least I know what people really think now.

So I've got a meeting with my supervisor on Thursday at Cumberland, gaaahhh gotta get in again somehow, at least this time's it's 1000 instead of 0900. And this time I'm gonna take the bus there instead of walking 40min to the research unit. Hmm... gotta bring lunch. And do a lotta reading related to survey/questionnaire type of quantitative research.
What I HATE about this thesis is I KNOW I can't produce work that would shake the nursing practice world, as in significantly impact practice. It just seems that the research I'll be doing is just to improve my skills and methodology. It's just that if I spend so much time and effort in it, I'd like something useful to come out of it, know what I mean?

Note to self: pack room and vacuum! There's hair everywhere...

TEA ROOM FOR HIGH TEA ON FRIDAY 1800

*cough* no really *cough*

Instead of feeling like ****e, I now have downgraded to feeling like garbage. Possibly helped by doing some retail Rx (hehehe).
Went shopping today in btoen, got some stuff, walked around a lot, got dodgy fish for lunch, (sworn never to go to that cafe again, except for pancakes). Will now only go to actual fish joint for seafood. Yea well.

So tonight we had a church girls' night watching Little Britain. Oh my goodness, did anyone else watch tonight's episode. I cracked up and cackled laughing and the girls were kinda mildly shocked at how I was laughing. Now I'm self conscious again, do I laugh funny?? Sadly my genuine laugh is a high-pitched squeal and evil Wicked Witch of the West cackle but for some reason the church people have never heard it. Hmmm. Perhaps I laugh more at Little Britain, with my bro, with my school friends and making up things for HP ff. And Yellow Fever had me rolling on the floor ;) Hmmm.

So yes, I made myself some Chinese-style Jewish penicillin. Yes chicken soup but with a bit of salt, soy sauce and ginger. I'm not exactly sure why I added ginger, oh yes, I didn't have all the ingredients for a western style chicken soup so I stuck to the basics. And for people who do not believe the benefits of chicken soup for a cold, please see here. There's more evidence but it's way too early in the morning and I'm not bothered.
So ladies, get that chicken soup in before the bird flu comes and gets all our chickens (if not us). I think I'll make another batch in a coupla days, western-style. :)

Recent purchases:
- 2 pairs of back shoes - must refund or exchange for another pair tomorrow (wrong size)
- 1 business-style skirt
- Priestess of the White - Trudi Canavan
- MACGYVER SEASON 2!!! - *jumps up and down* now for 3, 4, 5, 6 and 7...

I can't go to the conference or dinner...

Firstly because we couldn't get additional places coz we were too late in applying. :( But more so coz I'm sick and feel like crap. Actually, my supervisor said she's a keynote speaker and would help me get in, but I feel too sick to go to a 2 day conference in Brighton-le-sands. Dammit, I wanted to know what was happening in heart failure. *sigh*

So I went to the doc today, she's very thorough, I like her. I said "Irritated, dry throat since Thursday morning, clear running discharge from Saturday night, and just started clear light yellow phlegm this morning" (well not exactly phlegm). She checked my glands, took my temperature, and checked my BP, I was astonished to find out it was 137/83. Holy Cow!! That's systolic 20 above my normal 117/74. Meanwhile I'm sick so a bit of hypertension happens. lol, a bit. And she was thorough in asking ear aches AND "Any burning, irritation...?" (as in UTIs), now that's thorough, of course I said no, coz I didn't have any. Funny how you come in with flu symptoms and have questions asked about UTIs.

So it was as I predicted, saltwater gargles, honey and lemon and rest. And if it doesn't get better by Thursday, pay another visit and get a course of amoxycillin in case of a secondary bacterial infection. So if I feel good enough I can go to the conference on Wednesday but nahhh... I doubt I'd get over this that soon. *sigh* I really wanted to go to the conference, even sneaking in. *sigh*

So next week, I'm gonna get a full blood test and my annual flu vaccination. I'm gonna start a baseline blood test every 2 years now. The works, the Hep's, varicella, MMR, HIV just for my own benefit and safety in case of needlestick injuries and such. Karen: you should do it too!

Gaaaaaahhhhhh...

Okay, so should we have a cheap din din in Enmore before watching "Oh Danny Bhoy, the pipes, the pipes are calling"??

Tristan and Isolde: must see!!

I am going nutty over this reading!!!

Nuts I tell you! Insane! Bonkers! Craaaaazy! 3 fries short of a happy meal! Nuts!!!!

Gaaaahhhh soooo much reading to do

Well I've pretty much accessed what I can on nursing, cardiac rehabilitation and implantable defibrillators, which is a lot of medical journals but not enough nursing journals. I'm just skimming over this stuff and hyperventilating at the same time. I know I want to do quantitative research but it seems like this would be very hard due to the paucity in nursing research in this specific area. Not unless I follow what a German study did and do surveys on over 3000 people, ok that idea wouldn't turn out. But yikes, it seems like a specific hospital, med records, surveys. Most likely so far. Still much reading to do.

So you know how it takes me 1-2 hours to fall asleep when I hop into bed. Well damn I fell asleep sometime around 0130 this am (after turning my light off at 0100 mind you) and then at 0445 I heard little legs moving along my windowsill. Of course, being extraordinarily sensitive to insect noises, I had to get outta bed, pull off all my blankets and pillows and chase the bloody cockroach around my bedroom and swat it and flush it down the loo at 0500. Damn bloody cockroach, then I was lying in bed for the next hour trying to get back to sleep. Hot weather makes insects fly into your house and makes it damn hard to sleep. Stupid flying cockroaches... stupid flying cockroaches that attack you. We've killed at least 5 this past week, and a Huntsman hanging out on the boot of the car last night. *mumbles*

So for Saturday, I'll bring over Baileys, my pyjamas and for...

ANGI: can I offer you a batch of blueberry and treacle scones for the 100 stars??

Current background noise: zilch, but I'm sure pretty soon I'll hear some little legs scuttling along somewhere...

Current craving: water. I'm getting worried that I'm really DM2, I'm thirsty (well the heat really), I'm always running to the loo, I don't know whether I've lost any weight (ha!) and I'm tired quite a bit. But that's prob due to me stupidly ritualising my body to sleep at 0300 and waking up at 1200... I need some vitamin A, and C, and B2. And some more vitamins... from food.

Pun's graduation: Thursday 4th May, unfortunately I can't invite to the ceremony, there's already 3 going, ie. mum, dad, brother. Photos will definitely be taken of course, Pun in an oversized gown is very amusing to look at. And of course, dressing nicely (hahahaha) hmmm... the new dress I have is always too low, too much cleavage. You know, the girls at church have a line to indicate 'too much cleavage'... Mr. Fitzherbert. ;)

Happy 100th post!

Well here's a coupla excerpts of my bedtime reading, very, very interesting. And we're very lucky to be living in the modern age... (highlight to read... if willing...)

From Eve: Sex, Childbirth and Motherhood by Petrina Brown.

When complications arose in childbirth and instruments had to be used

Other instruments that struck fear into women were sharp hooks, called crotchets, and knives. While probably saving the mother's life, they would literally pull the baby out piece by piece.

If that doesn't make you grateful for being a woman in the Information age, I don't know what does.
In the Middle Ages, if a marriage debt (1 Corinthians 7: 3-5) was not met, it would be investigated by a group of wise matrons to test a woman's virginity or man's genitals, here's a case excerpt

The [...] witness exposed her naked breasts and with her hands warmed at the said fire, she held and rubbed the penis and testicules of the said John. And she embraced and frequently kissed the said John, and stirred him up in so far as she could to show virility and potency, admonishing him for shame that he should then and there prove and render himself a man. And she says, examined and diligently questioned, that the whole time aforesaid, the said penis was scarcely three inches long [...] remaining without any increase or decrease.

*rotflmao* I was chuckling so much. ;)

You know, I really don't censor much do I??

Well I can't have a big 21st bash

I'm getting a new laptop instead so *shrugs* laptop wins out.
So it'll just be an intimate PLC-ers dinner *sigh*. Ah well, I'll be needing the laptop for Hons work anyway and it is quite expensive a large, huge party... would cost more than the laptop. Much more. Much, much more. Ooooh, maybe I'll get all of you guys to come to Btown for pizza then have Leb sweets for dessert. No, no I'd rather something else.

I've bought 3 tix to Danny Bhoy on Saturday 25th March at Enmore Theatre. That is your 20th brithday present Cat so too bad, no books, no cd vouchers, no jobs... So, shall I meet you guys at your house and drive there or shall we have dinner first or what? Starts at 2000.

So today I went to Liverpool, to buy the tix and buy some clothes. I needed a business-like skirt I could wear to the networking dinner. And something on top. Also got 2 casual dresses that I can wear in autumn. Yays!

*sigh* I really feel like a housewife and I'm hating, hating, hating it. I've cooked dinner all week, I've vacuumed, done the laundry and my brother comes home and complains that I should do the ironing. "**** off, I'm not doing the ****ing ironing." I really, really, really hate the ironing. He has absolutely no excuse not to do it, only that he's a lazy little git. And it's not like I have nothing to do, I've got bloody research and lit reviews to do.

Anyways, pasta bolognese tonight coz 'I cook, you clean' deal. Actually I don't mind the cooking, hell I love the cooking, I hate the cleaning up. I really don't like it when people don't do their share. You know, I don't think I could ever, ever, ever be a hausfrau, I'd rather shoot myself in the foot. Preferably not the bone though, I still love to dance.

Current background noise: air conditioner, my brother watching season 5 of Scrubs on his computer
Current craving: water
Concurrent webpage: I fixed up the date and time on zee post on Spampage. ;)

Recent purchases:
- 1 dress from Tree of life - casual and pretty
- 1 dress - more so business-like
- 1 green formal-ish top
- 1 business black skirt - I really don't like the idea of networking, I know it has to be done in research and all and I am attending them as a research assistant but it seems so uppidy-doo-dah with a pineapple shoved up your butt. I feel like I should've joined the Ex-Students Union.

Eeeep, Honours Orientation was today.

So for the past 2 weeks or so I was trying to work out how to get there without, you know, driving *smirks* Have decided must get Ps. I had to bus it from home to Parra, then from Parra I could either bus and walk, or taxi. Well guess which one I decided, yep I walked there, all the way from Westfield Parra to Cumberland Hospital, took me around 40min and a gentle slope as well. Have decided to take the train or bus to Westmead next time and walking from there, even though I liked the walk, I don't know about walking through quiet streets much.'

Eeep, I have to do a LOT of reading, no not ff either. I need to do a lotta on implantable defibrillators, outcomes and cardiac rehab *sigh* then I gotta go to Cumberland probably twice a week or so. Gaaaahhhhh... I really don't like that hospital, bad memories.

So I'm nervous but a tad, only a little bit, very little bit less nervous than I was earlier. The thesis has to be between 15000-20000 words. The phD student who's co-supervising me showed us his, around 22000 word thesis and he's on a scholarship from the NHRMC for his phD *hyperventilates*. But I'm gonna look at this positively, the main part of the thesis is just 6 essays, yep, yep just 6 essays. Not including the huge 25 pages of references, 10 pages of contents and acknowledgements, and of course all the appendices costing around 40 pages. *grabs paper bag*

I'll be fine, I'll be fine, I'll be fine.

In other news, I'm most likely attending a 2 day conference on heart failure (Tues/Wed) at Brighton-Le-Sands in 2 weeks time, with a free night's accommodation paid by alphapharm. ;)Also there's a dinner on that Wednesday night at Darling Harbour that I have to go to. ;)
Oh Cat, do you mind if I crash at your house that night?? Wed 22nd?

AND I've decided to sell my uni nursing uniform, the oh-so-very-NOT-polymer-made-uniform. I think I'll miss the dress though. It was so bloody created by a man dammit, the whole zip-up, zip-down white nursing dress *mumble*. Sliding out of it wearing a slip and skin-coloured stockings. I should just keep it, oh yea, yea I'll keep it, I've just bought a white suspender belt a few weeks ago... although I don't have any thigh high white stockings.
But then again, I hate it when you guys make fun of 'naughty PVC nurse' so I really shouldn't encourage it eh? And there is a lovely emesis stain from first week of first semester, first year clinical. Hmmm... what should I do ladies, keep it for fun or sell it for $50?

Anyways, homework this week, do a LOT of lit reviews. Dammit. Probably have to go into uni this week again. But I think I'll go get myself a USB 1gig, and this laptop is dying on me. Hmmm, my dad is coming back next month... perhaps for my 21st I can beg him to get me a laptop which isn't dying on me, with Endnote 7. Hmmm...

Current background noise: Prince - Cream
Current craving: water, feel dehydrated, also blueberries, blueberries currently very very nice, blackberries quite sour. Still have more than half a plum cake at home... can't eat by myself...
Concurrent webpage: Dick Smith, kinda expensive, must go searching.

Oh oh I'm wearing my new pyjamas ;) Zee light blue XL men's FCUK T shirt ;) Tis quite big ;)

You know, we should lounge about Kino a bit more.

But I wish they had fruity cheesecakes instead of chocolate-y ones. I mean yes, chocolate and caramel is all nice but I felt like something fruity today. Oooh, La Renaissance...
Once I get an espresso machine, Cat will have to come over and make capuccinos for me all day! Yays! Or maybe I can buy you a coffee cart and you can trail me around everywhere ;)

I came back on the train today, got slightly drenched in the pouring rain, and next time remind me to wear a cardy and a long skirt or pants. Twas quite cool when I got home some time round 1850.

I'm considering having another slice of plum cake... and a cuppa tea. Will have one after I post this up. Slightly burnt on the bottom, okay it is burnt on the bottom but it's a very, very thin layer of charcoal ;) Maybe I should whip up some cream with a bit of castor sugar and serve it with the cake *feels heart slowly running out of blood to pump from severe arterioclerossis and artherosclerosis* okay, perhaps not. Oh yea, I gotta go buy some castor sugar tomorrow.

Suddenly have a craving for roast pumpkin. I think I'll go buy a pumpkin tomorrow as well.

BTW, anyone who's gotten a bit tired of Sudoku, you have to try Kakuro, I'm struggling with the easy ones, meanwhile I've only played in the book three times. But it's getting easier.

Current background noise: TV, Sex and the City, I do not watch that...
Current craving: roast pumpkin, oooh maybe I'll do some roast sweet potato with that, oooh.
Concurrent webpage: HP ff

*sigh* somewhat worrying (edit)

You know how on blogs you just type up what's been happening around you, telling people about your day, interesting things you've seen, thought of, read, drove into, but you don't actually expect people of various different groups that you're in, to actually read it. Well, hi Andrew! And Mish if you stumble upon this.
I mean I know if it's not good to type, don't type it up, exactly the same as the "If you have nothing good to say, don't say anything at all." Also I kinda feel like I should be censoring what I'm typing, not that I should need censoring coz I shouldn't be typing anything that would need censoring.
But I find it kinda disturbing that church people can now see my blog, oh bugger I gotta go take something down now, crap. Ahhhh!!
But one thing for sure, you guys (PLC-ers) know a lot more about me than other people I hang out with. Obviously, I mean there's stuff I divulge in confidence (well goodness knows if you guys divulge that stuff in confidence to someone else) but I don't expect 2 groups to mesh and share information.
I guess that's one thing I'm hesitant about, mixing my social groups, especially at a 21st party. I love big get-togethers, I love having everyone there, the more, the merrier, but I dread the thought of running around trying to entertain as many people as possible. When I think of a happy occasion, I think of sitting down, having a drink (or two, hehe happy Happy occasion), chatting and laughing boisterously with friends. You can say what Angi and I were doing on, quoting POTO and laughing on the couch at Lena's 21st.

Okay rambling now.

Current background noise: Cat on the phone and stupid laptop's sound won't work, possibly soundcard trouble.
Current craving: water, water, water...
Concurrent webpage: none really, I'm downloading SG1 right now, very very slow.

"Erik, Erik, Erik..."

Edit:
Went to Btown for fruit shopping today. The plums looked absolutely nasty at Fields of fruit, then went to the other fruit store, a little better but not all that much. Went home, made plum cake outta The Cook's Companion. Just had a slice with vanilla bean pure gelato. Mmmm... not too bad if I can say so myself.

Oh yea, I'm still meeting you Cat at Kino at 1515. I gotta go buy a bday present, no not for you :P bwhahahahaha.